In today’s world, feeling joyful can be challenging. We navigate daily stressors, news headlines and life’s uncertainties, often feeling like joy is out of reach. Yet, with a few simple changes, we can feel more joyful and create many downstream benefits. The holiday season is a wonderful time to practice. Anchoring joy is about intentionally creating moments of positivity, and then savoring them so they can take root and reshape our mental landscape. This simple yet powerful practice can bring about profound changes.
Our brains are designed to keep us alive, and evolution has shaped us to be on high alert for potential dangers—this is known as the “negativity bias.” Our ancestors lived in environments filled with threats, from predators to food scarcity. Being attuned to danger helped them stay alive. A rustling in the bushes might have been the wind—or it might have been a lurking predator. Those who erred on the side of caution were more likely to survive and pass on their genes.
Today, our surroundings have drastically changed, but our brains remain wired in much the same way. We no longer face saber-toothed tigers, but our brains are still primed to focus on threats and negative events, and the news takes advantage of this natural tendency. This bias means that negative experiences and emotions tend to be processed differently than positive ones. We might receive a dozen compliments, but it’s that one criticism that lingers in our mind. This tendency can create a mental environment where stress, anxiety and worry dominate.
The good news is that while our brains have this inherent bias, they are also incredibly adaptable. Thanks to a concept known as neuroplasticity, we can reshape our neural pathways over time. Neuroplasticity is the brain’s ability to reorganize itself by forming new connections. It allows us to navigate our changing environment, learn new skills, alter our thought patterns and recover from brain injuries.
By consciously shifting our focus from the negative to the positive, we can counterbalance the brain’s natural inclination toward fear. This process doesn’t mean ignoring life’s challenges or adopting a blind optimism, but rather, it means cultivating a mindset that is open to noticing and appreciating the good moments when they occur. In doing so, we can gradually tip the scales in favor of joy and well-being. Some call it “pragmatic optimism,” or a humorous friend describes herself as a “terminal optimist.”
Anchoring joy involves deliberately focusing on positive experiences and allowing ourselves to fully absorb them. It’s about making a habit of noticing small moments of pleasure—a warm cup of coffee in the morning, the sound of laughter, a beautiful sunset—and giving those moments the attention they deserve. By doing this, we can train our brains to linger on positive emotions rather than allowing them to pass by unnoticed.
Here are a few ways to start anchoring joy in your life:
1. Savor the Small Moments: Instead of rushing through your day, take time to pause and truly experience the positive moments. When something pleasant happens, like enjoying a good meal or hearing your favorite song, take a few extra seconds or minutes to lean in. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and let yourself feel the joy in that moment.
2. Practice Gratitude: Each day, make a habit of writing down three things you are grateful for. These don’t have to be major events—simple things like a kind word from a friend or a sunny day can be enough. By focusing on what you’re grateful for, you are training your brain to notice the positive aspects of your life. Making this part of your nightly ritual can also prime your brain for more positive dreams.
3. Mindfulness: Take a few moments each day to simply observe your surroundings without judgment. Focus on the sensation of the sun on your skin, the smell of fresh flowers or the sound of birds chirping. This practice helps ground you in the present moment and appreciate the beauty that is often overlooked. You can reinforce these pleasant moments anytime you wish by closing your eyes and reviewing them in your mind’s eye.
4. Celebrate All Wins: Don’t wait for big achievements to feel proud or happy. Acknowledge and celebrate the small wins in your life as well, whether it’s completing a task at home or work, making it through a difficult conversation, making the wise food choice or sticking to your exercise routine. By recognizing these moments, you reinforce a sense of accomplishment and positivity.
5. Plan Activities That Will Create Joy: While this may seem obvious, often times we get so caught up in day-to-day responsibilities we forget to make time for joy. Reflect on what makes you most joyful and try to integrate more of it into your routine. It can be something as simple as 10 minutes of comedy during your day or something complicated like a dinner party or vacation.
6. Active Recall: Sharing joyful experiences with a family member, friend or journal reinforces these positive memories. Take photos of joyful moments and put them on your mantel as a visual reminder. Buying a souvenir serves the same productive purpose so bring something home from the next joyful outing. It doesn’t need to be anything expensive just something to jog your memory. So, next time you go to a theatre or concert, grab that T-shirt and invest a few more dollars in savoring the experience.
Anchoring joy is not only beneficial for our own well-being but also has a ripple effect on those around us. We tend to approach others with more kindness and understanding, creating a more positive atmosphere in our relationships and communities. The old phrase “When we smile, the whole world smiles with us” is scientifically accurate. We have mirror neurons in our brain that mimic what we see, so our smile directly impacts others. Thus, your practice can transform not just your emotional well-being but also your families, friends and co-workers as well.
It’s important to remember that anchoring joy is not about achieving a constant state of bliss. Life will always have its ups and downs, and moments of sadness or frustration are a natural part of the human experience. Anchoring joy is about creating a mental habit that helps us weather the storms of life with a bit more grace.
For those of us living in a world that often seems to prioritize productivity and speed, anchoring joy can be a powerful reminder to slow down and appreciate the present. It is a way of saying to ourselves, “This moment matters. This feeling of contentment, however small, is worth holding onto.” And over time, as we continue to anchor these moments, we may find that joy becomes a more natural and lasting presence in our lives.
“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”
Thich Nhat Hanh
